The Monster is Coming

Welcome back Gentle Readers
Today we have double the leasons this one is for a young man I know called Chia he did not know of something very important so now I shall tell you all how to Kill A Monster Using The Art of The Giggle.
This story begins also a msn convo but this one between bobby lilly and fred the cat.
Shonny. says: (11:20:55 AM)THE MOSTER IS COMMING RUN HIDE EVERYBODY
Lilth Rozemarie says: (11:21:04 AM)lol
Frankie aka. JD says: (11:21:46 AM)lol
Lilth Rozemarie says: (11:22:32 AM)*run away gigling*
Frankie aka. JD says: (11:23:05 AM)ha ha
Shonny. says: (11:23:36 AM)WHAT I AM TELLING THE TRUTH RUN FOR YOU LIFE
Lilth Rozemarie says: (11:23:56 AM)*keeps runing while gigling*
Shonny. says: (11:24:34 AM)STOP GIGLING
Lilth Rozemarie says: (11:24:52 AM)*starts gigling uncontrolably*
Shonny. says: (11:25:02 AM)THIS IS NOT A GIGLING MATTER
Shonny. says: (11:25:13 AM)WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE
Lilth Rozemarie says: (11:26:15 AM)I *giggle* cant *giggle* stop *giggle* laughing *non stop giggling*
Shonny. says: (11:27:38 AM)SEE BOBBIE HAS DONE THE RIGHT THING BY RUNNING AWAY WHY CAN'T YOU JUST RUN AWAY WITH OUT GIGGLING SO THE MONSTER WILL NOT FOLLOW YOU I AM TRYING TO SAVE YOUR LIFE
Lilth Rozemarie says: (11:27:53 AM)*GIGGLE*
Shonny. says: (11:28:19 AM)THATS IT I DON'T CARE I HOPE THE MONSTER EATS YOU
Lilth Rozemarie says: (11:28:32 AM)*GIGGLE*
Frankie aka. JD says: (11:29:50 AM)ok..
Lilth Rozemarie says: (11:29:53 AM)lol
Lilth Rozemarie says: (11:30:07 AM)BOBBYS BACK *GIGGLE*
Frankie aka. JD says: (11:31:49 AM)i'm the monster *eats*
Shonny. says: (11:32:08 AM)MOSTER CAN YOU EAT FRED PLEASE
Frankie aka. JD says: (11:32:46 AM)*EATS FRED*
Lilth Rozemarie says: (11:32:52 AM)lol
Lilth Rozemarie says: (11:33:00 AM)*GIGGLE*
Shonny. says: (11:33:21 AM)THANK YOU MONSTER I LOVE YOU Frankie aka. JD says: (11:33:23 AM)that tickles my stomach
Lilth Rozemarie says: (11:33:37 AM)*giggle*
Frankie aka. JD says: (11:40:56 AM)that hurts my intestinal lining :P
Lilth Rozemarie says: (11:41:36 AM)you keep saying that and i keep giggling you know that right
Lilth Rozemarie says: (11:41:45 AM)oh yer and *giggle*
Frankie aka. JD says: (11:42:58 AM)MY PANCREAS! OH DEAR LORD MY PANCREAS!
Lilth Rozemarie says: (11:43:08 AM)*giggle*
Frankie aka. JD says: (11:43:45 AM)OH SHIT! MY SELF DESTRUCT BUTTON! *explodes*
Lilth Rozemarie says: (11:43:59 AM)*just keeps giggling*
Frankie aka. JD says: (11:44:32 AM)*is millions of pieces on ground*
Lilth Rozemarie says: (11:44:50 AM)*giggle*
And that is how you kill someone with the art of giggling
Sweet Nightmares Children
Your Dreadful Blogger Lil-Roze

How to Destroy the World in Fifty Seconds or Less

Why Hello Gentle Readers
Welcome to my little blog, Today I have a briliant leason for you:
HOW TO DESTROY THE WORLD IN FIFTY SECONDS OR LESS
In this leson we will learn how one Josef Franks new haircut became the end of the world. This story begins as many of these blogs surely do, with a msn convo between myself and the afore mention Josef Frank the two where discusing a simple problem. Josef was in due time for a hair cut and like the girl he is was asking for help on the style and so our story begins:
josef.frank512@gmail.com says: (3:44:36 PM)
i need a haircut. suggest a style :P
josef.frank512@gmail.com says: (3:45:00 PM)
please don't say a bieber cut :P
Lilith-Roze says: (3:45:08 PM)
goddess no!
josef.frank512@gmail.com says: (3:46:28 PM)
woo! how about an opalescent afro with disco lights? that'd just look... yeah, horrible
Lilith-Roze says: (3:49:55 PM)
completely horrible
josef.frank512@gmail.com says: (3:50:20 PM)
worst possible haircut?
josef.frank512@gmail.com says: (3:50:36 PM)
or maybe that's dreadlocks with tinsel wrapped into it...
Lilith-Roze says: (3:51:21 PM)
yes
josef.frank512@gmail.com says: (3:52:36 PM)
if i ever see that, i'll know the world is physically coming to an end
Lilith-Roze says: (3:52:52 PM)
do it
josef.frank512@gmail.com says: (3:53:30 PM)
do what?
josef.frank512@gmail.com says: (3:53:52 PM)
you aren't actually suggesting i get tinsel dreadlocks, are you?
Lilith-Roze says: (3:54:49 PM)
yes
josef.frank512@gmail.com says: (3:55:49 PM)
oh wow. there are so many reasons against it, like that the world would actually end. give me three reasons why i should :P
Lilith-Roze says: (3:58:11 PM)
so that we could write something on wikipiedia and it come true
josef.frank512@gmail.com says: (3:59:24 PM)
"And as the great prophet Bobby once said, 'The world will end if a person is stupid enough to get tinsel dreadlocks.'" ok, that's a good first reason. now two more :P
Lilith-Roze says: (4:00:28 PM)
Because Eurovision told you too (from lilly)
josef.frank512@gmail.com says: (4:02:47 PM)
i've actually got turkey's song from eurovision this year on my iriver... so fair enough. so, one more reason, people
Lilith-Roze says: (4:16:32 PM)
Um because everyone of my friends said you should (from the weird group)
Josef says: (4:26:47 PM)
oh, well, if the weirdos say i should *gets hair extensions - ties tinsel in - creates dreadlocks* there, done
Josef says: (4:26:54 PM)
*watches world split in two*
Lilith-Roze says: (4:26:57 PM)
lol
Josef says: (4:31:40 PM)
*watches world tear apart* there goes scotland, there goes hawaii. oh no! switzerland! where will i get my chocolate now!?
Lilith-Roze says: (4:32:08 PM)
lol and not home not hawaii
Josef says: (4:33:01 PM)
oh cool. *puts hawaii back by magic*
Lilith-Roze says: (4:33:10 PM)
thank you
Josef says: (4:33:52 PM)
*sends mainland america up instead*
Lilith-Roze says: (4:34:06 PM)
no dont be mean to the us of a
Josef says: (4:34:27 PM)
aww. why not? *america is hovering midair*
Lilith-Roze says: (4:34:53 PM)
coz i like it * in coaxing voice* it has disney land?
Josef says: (4:35:19 PM)
but, but! fine *drops america*
Lilith-Roze says: (4:35:33 PM)
lol
Josef says: (4:35:48 PM)
great britain. can we at least get rid of the brits?
Lilith-Roze says: (4:35:57 PM)
no!
Josef says: (4:36:04 PM)
but, but, but
Lilith-Roze says: (4:36:07 PM)
or scotland
Josef says: (4:37:07 PM)
hmph. i give up. *throws kazhakstan into space*
Lilith-Roze says: (4:37:14 PM)
cool
Josef says: (4:37:46 PM)
*watches borat fly away*
And that my Dear Readers is how the world ended one beautifully rainy Monday afternoon. I do hope you learnt something, Like not to ever get dredlocks with tinsel in it.
Good night all I do hope you have night mares of this very event
From Your Dreadful Blogger Lil-Roze
*Blows out lantern leaving a dark screen with evil laughter behind*
Have the best Nightmares Children

HOW TO WIN THE DARWIN AWARD SEVENTEEN TIMES

HELLO BOYS AND GIRLS, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN AND THAT GUY WITH THE REALLY COOL HAT.
Ok so there is a weird name for this post but i learnt (after a very weird conversation about justin bieber) that one of my friends JOSEF likes to put people on wikipedia with weird things writen about them such as
May 1st 1994 – Brendan Tisdell, Australian magician, bodybuilder and actress
February 15th 1997 – Brianna McCluskey, Australian mystic and pioneer of Neovoodooism
Those were births now these are deaths
May 1st 2015 – Siobhann McCluskey, Winner of the Darwin Awards seventeen times (b. 1993)
December 13th 2012 – Brianna McCluskey + The Whole World, Australian mystic, has predicted that the world will end ON THIS DAY, so EVERYONE will die. Don't miss it.
So yer the name is relivent
oh and guys i learnt while writing this that if you look it up shonnys has been deleted
as has mine and everyone elses death
but well we loved them and believe they should have stayed
Now for something i found funny
SOME WINNERS OF THE DARWIN AWARDS
Juggling active hand grenades (Croatia, 2001),
Leaving a lit cigarette in a warehouse full of explosives (Philippines, 1999)
Jumping out of a plane to film skydivers without wearing a parachute (U.S., 1987),
Trying to get enough light to look down the barrel of a loaded muzzleloader gun using a cigarette lighter (U.S., 1996),
Using a lighter to illuminate a fuel tank to make sure it contains nothing flammable (Brazil, 2003),
Attempting to play Russian roulette with a semi-automatic pistol that automatically loads the next round into the chamber,
or attempting Russian roulette with an unexploded landmine,
Crashing through a window and falling to one's death in trying to demonstrate that the window is unbreakable.
AND NOW FOR SOME A HONORABLE ONE
a man died of alcohol poisoning after having two 1.5 litre bottles (over 100 fluid ounces) of sherry inserted anally.
OVER AND OUT
LOVE
LIL-ROZE

bobby and fred's theatre of epicness #2

*on speaker* HELLO AND WELCOME
TO BOBBY AND FRED'S THEATRE OF EPICNESS

TONIGHT WE HAVE THE SKETCH CALLED "AHHHHH FLYING COW"
STARING FRED AS CAPTAIN HISSYFIT AND BOBBY AS HER TRUSTY SIDEKICK SIR REAL

Civilain:AHHHHH FLYING COW
SIR REAL says:
OH MY GOD! COME ON CAPTIAN, WE CAN FIX THIS *turns into a rocket bull - zooms towards cow*
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
*in super hero voice* BUT HOW?
SIR REAL says:
WE MUST HIT IT'S WEAK SPOT
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
BUT WHERE WOULD THAT BE
SIR REAL says:
SOMEWHERE NO ONE WOULD DARE TOUCH
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
OH *looks away*
SIR REAL says:
BUT CAPTAIN HISSYFIT, YOU HOLD THE KEY
SIR REAL says:
YOU MUST KILL IT
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
EWW
SIR REAL says:
I KNOW. TAKE MY GLOVES
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
OK?
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
*takes gloves* NOW WHAT?
SIR REAL says:
ATTACK!!! *flies forward*
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
OK? *moves to attack then stops* WAIT HOW ARE WE ATTACKING THIS THING?
SIR REAL says:
YOU'LL FIGURE IT OUT. WHERE WOULD SOMEONE NEVER TOUCH ON THIS COW?
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
UM EVERYWHERE?
SIR REAL says:
NO, IT'S CLEAN AND CUTE
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
OH THEN UM IM NOT SURE?
SIR REAL says:
PICK SOMEWHERE AND TRY. JUST DO IT NOW BEFORE IT EATS US!
SIR REAL says:
TRY OR WE ALL DIE
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
FINE CAN I USE MY LASERS?
SIR REAL says:
NO! PUNCH IT WITH YOUR GLOVED FIST OR THE WHOLE WORLD WILL PERISH.
NARRATOR: and so, bree is given an ultimatum
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
OH GODDESS WAIT WHAT IS MY MOTAVTION?
SIR REAL says:
TO SAVE THE WORLD AND YOURSELF
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
AND I CARE ABOUT THE WORLD WHY?
SIR REAL says:
YOU LIVE THERE. AND YOU LEECH YOUR POWER OFF THE EARTH, SO IF IT DIES, YOU DIE
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
FINE THEN!
SIR REAL says:
WHERE DO YOU PUNCH IT?
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
I DONT KNOW WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME?
SIR REAL says:
WHERE ARE YOU GOING TO PUNCH IT!? WE HAVE THREE MINUTES OR IT KILLS US
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
UM I HAVE AN IDEA!
SIR REAL says:
YES?
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
MEGA FIST *GLOVED FIST INLARGES*
SIR REAL says:
OH?
SIR REAL says:
WHAT WILL YOU DO NOW?
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
CAN I JUST HIT IT WITH THIS?
SIR REAL says:
NO, YOU MUST HIT IT IN A CERTAIN PLACE OR IT WILL EXPLODE!
SIR REAL says:
ONE MORE MINUTE!!!
CAPTAIN HISSYFIT says:
HOW ABOUT THIS? *shows a large blanket* ITS CALLED AN EXPLODOKET ITS A BLANKET THAT IN CASES AN EXPLOSION
SIR REAL says:
30 SECONDS!
SIR REAL says:
IT'S A NUCLEAR EXPLOSION, CAPTAIN!
SIR REAL says:
10
SIR REAL says:
9
SIR REAL says:
8
narrator: and so the captain has found out it's weakness no one would ever touch a cow in it's eyes the cow dies and so, the world is one again safe thanks to the quick thinking of captain hissyfit as she uses her smarts to destroy the evil flying cow. and so the moral of this story is: DON'T MESS WITH SUPERCOWS! ... unless you're a superhero

*back on speaker* IM SORRY FOLKS
BUT THATS ALL WE HAVE TIME FOR TONIGHT YOU CAN SEE THIS ALL AGAIN ON THE BLOG I AM THE BATMAN! TUNE IN AGAIN SOON FOR MORE INSANITY
OVER AND OUT FOLKS

bobby and fred's theatre of epicness #1

*on speaker* WELL HELLO AND WELCOME
TO BOBBY AND FRED'S THEATRE OF EPICNESS
TONIGHT WE HAVE A ONCE IN A LIFE TIME CHANCE TO SEE A SKETCH DONE BY OUR OWN BOBBY AND FRED! CALLED WHERE IS MY WAREHOUSE
BOBBY:
HOW MUCH IS A WAREHOUSE!?
FRED:
NOTHING!
BOBBY:
OMG! WHERE DO I GET
FRED:
*in sales tone aka add speak* at the bargin where everyone gets a warehouse
BOBBY:
is it big?
FRED:
why of course here at the bargin we do not sell small warehouses *whispers* we just give them away
BOBBY:
I WANT
FRED:
lol THEN SIR YOU WILL HAVE
BOBBY:
GIMME GIMME GIMME
FRED:
RIGHT AWAY NOW WHAT TYPE WOULD YOU LIKE?
BOBBY:
ONE SUITABLE FOR RAVE PARTIES
FRED:
WELL WE HAVE MANY LIKE THAT WOULD YOU LIKE BIG? SMALL? ELECTRICITY WORKING?
BOBBY:
(hahaha) ELECTRICITY PLEASE! AND MEDIUM SIZED
FRED:
COMING RIGHT UP NOW *strugles to keep straight face*WOULD YOU*muffled giggles* LIKE IT DELIVERED?
BOBBY:
YES PLZ. IN A BOX!?
FRED:
NO WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE IT SENT WE HAVE WIZARD THEY NEED THE ADRESS TO TELEPORT IT
BOBBY:
123 FAKE STREET SHOULD BE FINE
FRED:
*lol* RIGHT AWAY SIR *whisper* sucker
BOBBY:
AH HERD DAT
FRED:
lol HEARD WHAT SIR I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING?
BOBBY:
YA CALLED ME A SUCKA
FRED:
NEVER I WOULD NOT DO THAT SIR IF I DID THAT I WOULD LOSE ALL OF MY IMPLOYE OF THE MONTH AWARDS*show room with walls covered in employe of the month awards*
BOBBY:
HMMK. I SHALL TAKE YOUR WAREHOUSE THEN. I EXPECT IT AT MY PLACE WHEN I GET HOME
FRED:
OF COURSE SIR *murmered* sucker
BOBBY:
*runs away* she's a sucker. gave her the wrong address
FRED:
lol *speaker* AND THAT WONDERFUL POFORMANCE WAS CALLED "NOW WHERE IS MY WAREHOUSE" STARING OUR VERY OWN BOBBY AND FRED THE CAT CAN I HAVE A ROUND OF APALASE?
BOBBY:
*claps like crazy*
FRED:
WHY THANK YOU *bows*
BOBBY:
*bows too*
BOBBY:
NOW WHAT DID THAT PERFORMANCE TEACH YOU?
FRED:
*kids voice* NOT TO LISTEN TO SALES PEOPLE *please say no please say no*
BOBBY:
NO
FRED:
OH I KNOW I KNOW
FRED:
NOT TO BE A SUCKER?
BOBBY:
YES, BUT THERE IS A POWERFUL MESSAGE. THEY BOTH THOUGHT THEY WON, BUT THOUGHT THE OTHER LOST.
BOBBY:
MORAL IS:
BOBBY:
VICTORY IS IN THE EYE OF THE BEHOLDER
FRED:
OH OK WELL MISTER DOES THAT MEAN I CAN WIN WHENEVER I WANT?
BOBBY:
WHY YES, YES IT DOES JIMMY
FRED:
YAY *to little boy next to him* I WON YOU LOST NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH
*back on speaker* IM SORRY FOLKS
BUT THATS ALL WE HAVE TIME FOR TONIGHT YOU CAN SEE THIS ALL AGAIN ON THE BLOG I AM THE BATMAN! TUNE IN AGAIN TOMORROW FOR MORE INSANITY

No Not My Turkeys

HI ALL
Okay so today= random day
so therefore
Random day = Random Blog
So my sister shon (lilly) was ripping off song lyrics and here are the results:
Your way to beautiful boobs.- shon high on chilly sauce
My life would suck without boobs.- shon still high on chilly sauce-My life would suck without you in my place
Grizly! This love makes me wanna throw up.- shon still high on chilly sauce- Love and Wonder (club edit)
Knock on my window. Knock on my door I wanna feel a little less stalkerish- Shon and ants high on chilly sauce- Love and Wonder (club edit)
When the beat kicks in I can feel it in your bones- Shon just being random- Boys and Girls
You know you want drugs! You want rock! You want sex appeal!- Shon being high and hungry- United State of Pop 2009 (Blame It on the Pop)
So don't worry even if the drugs are coming down- Shon cracking up laughing - United State of Pop 2009 (Blame It on the Pop)
So Baby dont worry even if JZ knocks you up- United State of Pop 2009 (Blame It on the Pop)
LOVE LIL
HAVE A GOOD EASTER ALL
AND A GOOD HOLIDAY
I HOPE ITS AS RANDOM AS MY DAY TODAY WAS
OVER AND OUT

BOBBY LILLY AND FRED THE CAT VOL 3

This ain't a love song this is goodbye. says: (6:27:59 PM)josef shonvon wants to know were u went
This ain't a love song this is goodbye. says: (6:28:22 PM)her words were "bobby were are you"
Frankie says: (6:32:01 PM)um.. wha?
Shonny. says: (6:32:18 PM)bobbies back I thought i lost you
This ain't a love song this is goodbye. says: (6:32:21 PM)shes calling u bobby
Frankie says: (6:34:42 PM)oh? then i'm calling her lily
This ain't a love song this is goodbye. says: (6:34:59 PM)im good with that
Shonny. says: (6:34:59 PM)yay bobbies back
This ain't a love song this is goodbye. says: (6:35:07 PM)oh can i have a name
Frankie says: (6:37:08 PM)you can be fred
Shonny. says: (6:37:25 PM)thats my cats name
This ain't a love song this is goodbye. says: (6:37:27 PM)i dont want to be a cat
Frankie says: (6:37:34 PM)meow
Frankie says: (6:37:39 PM)*talking to bree*
Shonny. says: (6:37:50 PM)go bobbie
Frankie says: (6:38:09 PM)meow graaawr
Frankie says: (6:38:40 PM)lily, is she really a cat?
:PShonny. says: (6:38:47 PM)yes
Shonny. says: (6:39:02 PM)she is meowing
Frankie says: (6:39:15 PM)awesome. bree's a cat? well, she's quite an intelligent one then :P
Shonny. says: (6:39:18 PM)now she is barking
Frankie says: (6:39:23 PM)WOOF!!
Shonny. says: (6:39:32 PM)lol
Frankie says: (6:39:44 PM)HORSE!!! (because horses yell 'horse', not 'neigh')
Shonny. says: (6:39:53 PM)lol
Frankie says: (6:40:17 PM)come back fred
This ain't a love song this is goodbye. says: (6:40:20 PM)good logic
Frankie says: (6:40:30 PM)YAY
This ain't a love song this is goodbye. says: (6:40:33 PM)lol
Shonny. says: (6:40:51 PM)she returns
Frankie says: (6:41:14 PM)wait... fred's a SHE now? :O
Shonny. says: (6:41:24 PM)it
Frankie says: (6:41:57 PM)ah. gender neutral
This ain't a love song this is goodbye. says: (6:42:15 PM)lol
Shonny. says: (6:42:20 PM)yep it got it's bits chopped off
This ain't a love song this is goodbye. says: (6:42:30 PM)stuff u all
Frankie says: (6:42:49 PM)ha ha. oh, don't be such a snickerpuss
Frankie says: (6:42:55 PM)not sure how i know that word
This ain't a love song this is goodbye. says: (6:43:00 PM)ok
Frankie says: (6:43:02 PM)or if i'm using it right
Frankie says: (6:43:10 PM)but i'm using it now :P
Shonny. says: (6:43:14 PM)lol
Frankie says: (6:43:47 PM)so, what's everyone doing?
Frankie says: (6:43:53 PM)lily? snickerpuss? :P
Shonny. says: (6:44:03 PM)playing a game and reading
Frankie says: (6:44:15 PM)ooh. what game? and reading what?
Shonny. says: (6:44:40 PM)home sweet home and late
Frankie says: (6:44:48 PM)oohk
This ain't a love song this is goodbye. says: (6:44:49 PM)im igonring bobby can u tell lilly
Frankie says: (6:45:00 PM)ok, fine
Frankie says: (6:45:07 PM)fred, what're you doing :P
Shonny. says: (6:46:14 PM)you know what bobbie we should start igonring her because thats what shes going to us/you
Frankie says: (6:48:25 PM)yeah, let's. so lil, how've you been today?
This ain't a love song this is goodbye. says: (6:49:00 PM)I WANT MINIONS
Shonny. says: (6:49:09 PM)pretty good i finished early but then i found out that i have a assessment due tomorrow
Shonny. says: (6:49:17 PM)and i have a test tomorrow as well
Shonny. says: (6:49:22 PM)what about you bobbie
Frankie says: (6:50:27 PM)i had THREE ASSIGNMENTS DUE TODAY *headdesk*
Frankie says: (6:50:29 PM)was not good
Frankie says: (6:50:32 PM)but it's k now
Frankie says: (6:50:40 PM)maths test on thursday tho
OVER AND OUT
LILITH-ROZE